Our original plan was to stay one year and we cut it short by about 5 months. Although we have only been here for 6 months it feels like so much longer! Time in Hawaii is very stagnant, it moves at a very slow pace, and I think I figured out why. There is no sense of time here, the seasons do not change so you never feel like you are progressing though life, but rather that you are in a trance-like state with no motivation. In a place with recognizable seasons you anticipate and look forward to the new and upcoming changes. You start your "spring cleaning" and are SO EXCITED when the first real warm day of summer arrives. You feel compelled to go outside or otherwise risk wasting a beautiful day. When there are gloomy days you have a good excuse to stay in, cuddle up in a blanket and watch movies, and you don't feel bad about it. And I MISS THAT! I miss the ever changing lifestyles. Here in Hawaii you know there will always be another sunny day, you start to take it for granted. The beach will always be there, you quit going as often. Nothing seems as spectacular because you never know what its like to not have it.
I love my home and I have realized since moving away that Oregon will always be the place I call home. I dont need fancy beaches and palm trees to be happy. All I need are my best friends, my loving family and my city. None of those are here and I miss it like crazy.
Now, dont get me wrong, I have no regrets moving here. We have met some wonderful people and done some amazing things. I have swam with the turtles and dolphins, I saw my first whale in the ocean, we have swam with Manta Rays, parasailed, zip-lined through jungle. We have tried new cuisines, hiked Wiapo Valley and Green Sands beach. We have stood on top waterfalls, seen actual lava, and stood upon a 13,700ft summit with the largest telescopes in the world. I have Kayaked and paddled boarded in the ocean, cliff jumped, and lived on my own for the first time. I have seen the North, South, East and West and almost everything in-between on this Island and I cant see anymore without getting on a plane. I have got what I wanted out of this Island.
I miss road trips, snowboarding and rock climbing, I miss big concerts and comedy shows at Harveys. I miss the skyline and tall buildings. I miss the city life and energy and never seeing the same thing twice. I miss running the streets of Portland never feeling judged because there is always someone weirder than you :) I miss our Karaoke bar. I miss all the varieties of food in Portland and of course the food carts! I miss Powells and riding my bike. I miss the coffee shops and buffalo exchange. I miss the BEER and all the great breweries in Portland! I miss dancing with my friends and 80's nights. I miss hiking the george and being in the forrest. I miss driving my car and blasting the music! i miss planning parties, game nights and bonfires. i miss the MALL and all the great shopping in Portland. I miss my art supply stores. I miss the waffle window and Dantes Pizza! I miss EDGEFIELD!!!! wine tasting, and outdoor fires. I miss OMSI after dark once a month, and pub quiz. I miss the fresh water, floating the river and wakeboarding. I miss dressing up and going out on the town, I miss boots and scarves and hats. i miss the taste of Oregon water and the smell of oregon air. You cant find any of this in hawaii, and that is my livelihood. I do not feel empowered or motivated here. It feels like a very long vacation, and I cant settle down and develop roots here.
I will admit it proudly, Im not an island girl like I thought I may be, I am a hippy city girl at heart. And I know when I get back home I will thrive.
I will forever travel this world to experience new things and humble myself. i will forever keep Learning because what is the point in living if you cant keep growing.
I will keep a part of Hawaii with me forever, but forever will Oregon be my home.
We do still have one more set of guests before we say goodbye for good, though. My cousin Curtis and his wife danielle are visiting May 1-10 ! I am actually really excited to have visitors one more time, it will give us reason to go out with a bang! Plus we have all but mastered being the perfect tour guides for the big Island, so we should get to see and do everything they want!
If you dont know the date yet, we will be landing back in Oregon May 16th at 8:15am, get ready for us! I cant wait to see everyone!! expect to be tackled with hugs!!
always love
Laur
